Saturday, June 23, 2012

This Week's Hairbrained Musings (4)

Another week, another collection moments and musings.

*It is a terrible idea to let your child view your Pinterest account, especially if you have a wicked sense of humor.  Let's just say I had some 'splainin to do-- and not do.

*We have a lot of hungry-looking women at our neighborhood pool.  I would love to lock their skinny asses up in a Burger King for the weekend so they can gain a few pounds.  It is not beautiful-- or healthy-- to be able to count your ribs simply by looking in the mirror.

*You know your dog has had loose bowels way too long when you catch yourself fist-pumping over the fact that he finally made a real turd, rather a puddle.  Sorry, y'all, but it's true.  And now all my neighbors that witnessed my little celebration are certain that I am every bit the freak that they suspected.

*An "afternoon delight" for a mom is sneaking in a quick nap and waking to find that the house is still standing and no one is bloody.  Awesome, right?!  See, you already want one, too.

*You know you have reached the pinnacle of motherhood when your kid asks you for a tissue in the car, and you tell her "Why don't you just use your shirt like you always do when we're at home?!  What about this situation deserves a tissue more than the times when they are readily available?!"  Harsh, I know... It's been a rough week, yo.

*My kids were pretty adamant about the fact that they would not eat a Southwestern-style salad, but they sure ate the heck out of some fajita chicken, served with corn and black beans over a bed of shredded Romaine.  My re-branding skills just keep getting better and better.

*How completely inappropriate is it to laugh when your third grader asks a library volunteer (who looks every bit of 14) if he can help her find something written by Dante, and the volunteer replies, "Is that a new kid's author?"  Yeah, that's what I thought, too.

Until next time...


  1. Ha! Trying to picture Dante's Inferno as a kids book!

  2. Gawd I wish we were neighbours (the "u" in that is the Canadian in me)!

    You're too funny!!! =D

    1. Wouldn't that be fun! I am sure you could teach me a thing or two about what I have to look forward to with a couple of spectrum-y teenagers-- over cocktails on the front porch, if we were neighbors. :) Guess we'll just have to settle for cyber-neighbors for now...

    2. For that last one, it's not inappropriate. I would have laughed as well, then had my kid tell the volunteer who Dante was. And recorded it for YouTube.

  3. Too funny!! And which pool do you go to? If you go to the kid-friendly one on G., it looks like most of the women there have spent entirely *too* much time in Burger King for what they're wearing... It always makes me feel better. :-)

    1. We usually go to the one on G, but on Wednesday morning, it's mostly skin and bones around there. There are a couple of moms that my 8 year-olds outweigh! Maybe I should go on the weekends instead... hmmm.

  4. I'm laughing and dying and laughing some more-- I needed that, thanks.

    Thanks too for spending a Wordless Wednesday with us. We'll be Aloha Friday Hopping with tomorrow, if you're up for more playing with others. =)