Saturday, June 16, 2012

This Week's Hairbrained Musings... (3)

*Some playground pick-up lines are very ineffective, such as "Look at this cool beetle!  He has serrated mandibles.  Those thing rock!!"  Shoving the "serrated mandibles" into the face of an unprepared child right after saying this (such as Birdie did on Playground Monday) almost led to one little boy crapping his underoos.

*The lady at Starbuck's does not like it when your kid asks for a scrap of paper, so that she can "write down her tip for the Tip Jar."  As a matter of fact, she seemed downright offended that an 8 year-old wanted to offer advice on coffee-making.

*Never, ever ask my kids "What do ya think?" about anything-- unless, of course, you've got all day or you like being frustrated, depending on which child you ask.

*People always feel the need to state the obvious.  For example, Princess followed me around Target for 20 minutes this week wailing at the top of her lungs.  At one point, a sales associate stopped me and said "You do know your little girl is crying, right?"  Gee, jackass-- I hadn't noticed.

*No one gives more advice about child-rearing than people that have never had kids.

*Somethings are better left unsaid-- but I'm going to say them anyway just to feel better.  Can't keep that venom pent up inside, now can we?

*Nothing is funnier than watching your bulldog run full-throttle as he makes his escape from the house, until you realize that you have catch him-- before he keels over from over-exertion (a 30 second sprint is a big deal to a bullie!).  The last time I saw our Buddy run that fast, I had accidentally dropped a pork chop on the kitchen floor!  (Don't worry-- he made it back alive!  He did need a 6 hour nap to recover, however.)

*Despite what you might think, it absolutely does not get funnier every time UPS guy leaves your package in the perfect spot to get run over!  Hubby is going to get tired of getting gifts with tire tread marks on them one day.

*Sam's Club on a Saturday is the perfect place for a free lunch.  Get those samples while they're hot!

*Shopping for Father's Day cards with your kids is soooo much funnier once they start understanding what the sarcastic cards mean-- and they pick those cards anyway!

Hope you and yours have a fabulous Father's Day!

Until next time...


  1. So cute!! Thanks for the follow at my place, now happily following you back :)

  2. Hehehe - I'm interested in what tip on coffee making was proffered...

    1. I'm not exactly sure about all of it. Something about step ladders at the order pick-up to make the place "little people-friendly" and making sure employees understood that money is covered in germs... I decided it was best not to pursue the whole story on this one, lest it turn into some sort of crusade. LOL

  3. Hi, I'm stopping by from the blog hop and following along!
    I hope you stop by and say hi.

  4. Hahah love this picture, I feel the same way when I take on too much. New follower from a blog hop, would love if you followed back at

  5. New follower via the monday blog hop. Look forward to getting to know you better!

  6. I found your blog listed in the blog hop. I love the posts especially this one. I find most absolutely applicable on my side of the world. I couldn't agree with you more. Hoping to read more from you.

    Rose of Grown-Ups For A Day!

  7. Hi I am following you from the Monday Hop and really enjoyed reading your post. Its good to come across something that makes absolutely perfect sense and get a good laugh about it.
    Hope you can follow back and I am looking forward to what you post next.

    PS love the one where you are trying to ignore your crying child... now if they only understood two stop making that noise!!! :)

  8. Hi! I found you on Mom's Monday Mingle. Your post is so funny, and yet so real! LOL! I agree people that have not had children yet just don't get it;) I am a new follower and I would love if you checked out my blog and followed back if you like it:)

  9. Haha this made me chuckle :)
    I have noticed that the ones who have all the parenting answers are the ones without kids, I don't have kids of my own so I keep my mouth shut, but friends that don't will say things like "my kids will never do that" and other crap. I've worked with kids long enough to know that my friends have no idea what they are talking about :)
    found you at Local Sugar and am following via GFC now.

  10. this is just too darn funny! I am just stopping in to say HI and THANKS a ton for linking up last Wordless Wednesday. We're linking up again today if you're up for sweetness/ really funniness with friends.