Saturday, September 1, 2012

This Week's Hairbrained Musings (13)

Another week of moments and musings.



*No matter how busy or active you think you were over the summer, nothing compares to the fatigue you feel at the end of each day during the first week of school!  The entire staff-- and most of the kids-- looked completely whipped when the final bell rang Friday.

*When I see the words "light" or "low-calorie" on a food package, I automatically assume that I should eat twice as much to feel satisfied.  FAIL.

*When my kids smile, it usually fills my heart with joy.  Some days, though, it fills me suspicion-- like when I see them exiting my bathroom looking like members of the Ringling Brother family.  I am fairly certain neither one of them was born with raisin colored eyelids or black paw prints on their cheeks.

*I have zero desire to exercise-- I use up all my desire wishing I didn't need to exercise.  That's not really working out for me so well.

*I realize that grocery stores naturally attract high school and college-aged employs to run their registers, but would it kill them to actually teach these kids how to use the registers?  Or make correct change?  That seems like a fairly important skill to have when counting money!  I handed the cashier $80 to pay for a $79.83 tab, and she first told me I didn't give her enough cash, and then she gave me back $18 in change.  How do you even accidentally calculate $18 for my change in that scenario?!

*I am starting to see a bright side to my 8 year-olds fitting into my shirts and shoes-- they can take my old things and feel like they are getting away with something, while I have the perfect excuse to get myself something new!  The not-so-bright-side-- the two of them will soon be big enough to break me in half!

*To the jerk that cut me off in the grocery store parking lot this week and then gave me the finger like I was the asshole:  jokes on you, buddy!  The three bags of groceries and 6 scratch tickets that fell off the open tailgate of your truck made a very nice gift to the lady parked next to me.  She was in need of bread and sandwich meat for her kids' lunches, and only had $2 bucks, so she appreciated your donation.

*Deodorant and perfume should not smell like anything you can get at a carnival or snack shop.  Cotton candy body spray and sweet strawberry scented deodorant are big mistakes, ladies-- especially if you actually sweat!

*Having a sense of humor makes stupid people a great form of entertainment, rather than mere pains in the ass.  I highly recommend getting one.  If you don't have a sense of humor yet, there's a chance you're part of the entertainment.

Until next time...

13 comments:

  1. Ahhh, my favorite time of the week! Love these posts!!!

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    1. Why, thank you, lady! Hope they make you smile, or blow Coke out your nose-- either works for me, really!

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  2. I totally agree about the sense of humor. I'm so guilty of mocking the stupid, I know for a fact that I'm heading straight to hell, but I'm having fun on my way there.

    Love your musings.

    Teri
    Snarkfest

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    1. Well, if you'll hold the door for me, you'll have some company!!

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  3. Too funny :) I agree about the deodorant smelling like cotton candy, yuck!

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  4. New follower from Mom's Monday Mingle. Happy to be jumping aboard the crazy train.

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  5. Hahaha...oh these were great and I love the karma behind the guy who flipped you off in the parking lot and lost his groceries...PERFECT!

    I don't prefer perfume up under my armpit either...and yes, it does make for some strange fragerence when sweating on it...LOL

    Irish

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  6. new follower from MMM!!! laughing pretty hard right now!

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  7. Just found you from the hop and glad I did. Love your sense of humor. I figure if you can't laugh at yourself all that leaves is crying! I'm a new follower so I'll be back!

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    1. Glad you're here, Karen! Thanks for riding the Crazy Train!

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  8. Hi Christina! I totally agree about the exercise thing! Also, I thought that I was already following you, but today I checked and found that I could follow you with GFC and FB. I'll also check Twitter before I go. Thanks for linking up on Make My Saturday Sweet blog hop and, of course, you have the coolest name! Take care!

    Tina (Christina) - mom of 4 and author of 5 blogs
    http://abooksandmore.blogspot.com

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