"Holy Crap"-eteria, An Aspie Poem

Those that know a school aged kid on the spectrum probably know how overstimulating the school cafeteria can be.  Spectrum-y kids tend to have heightened senses, especially hearing, smell and sight, which makes a busy place like the lunchroom even more annoying to them than the average joe.  I mean, really-- do you like to eat in there?!  The cafeteria is particularly stressful for my Princess, and often leads to her imminent defeat on days when she is already having trouble behaving at school.  I thought I'd give you a little insight about how it feels to be an Aspie in the cafeteria, based on my Princess's plethora of complaints about eating lunch in there.  :)

"Holy Crap"-eteria

I walk into the lunchroom

and what smacks me in the face?

A wall of noise, bright lights, loud boys--

You want me to do what in this place?!!!

The Magic of the Season

It's been a rough couple of weeks here on the Crazy Train, which I realize is no way to begin a Christmas holiday post, but it's true.

The holiday hubbub makes it hard for my darlings to deal with regular, everyday stuff, as was evidenced in Princess's school behavior two weeks ago (which will get it's own post, I am sure).  It made for a terrible week full of disciplinary action plans, visits to the principal, and tears.  I was sure the week couldn't get any worse until the tragedy in Connecticut occurred.

The Sandy Hook tragedy has left people across the nation mourning the loss of 27 human lives, most of which were too young to even comprehend.  On top of that unfathomable loss, the media managed to use this awful event to vilify Asperger's syndrome as well.  That unfortunate side effect has left parents like me-- parents of children on the autism spectrum-- doubly reeling with sadness and outrage, as we are left to defend our children and loved ones from the ignorant hate-mongering that abounds on social media and the news right now.

Add to all this stress two children with the flu and one mommy with a very high fever, a massive sinus infection, and what sounds like an emphysemic cough, and you can see why this Christmas season has been a little lackluster for me.

A funny thing has happened, though...

The Newtown Tragedy and Asperger's Syndrome

The tragic shooting that occurred at Sandy Hook Elementary School last Friday is just unfathomable.  I get a lump in my throat and my eyes burn with tears just thinking about it.  How are those folks in Newtown, Connecticut even breathing today?

The Newtown Fire Dept flag at half mast, courtesy of BusinessInsider.com

How will I breathe when I go back to work?  This week, when I walk into the elementary school at which I work, will it look different to me?  Will I be able to look at the faces of the children I see and greet and hug every day, and be able to hold myself together?  Will I be able to reassure these children that they are safe-- and really mean it?  Will I break down when I'm unable to stop the thoughts that this shooting could have happened at my school?  To my kids?

I'm sure I'll do whatever needs to be done, just as my co-workers will.  But no matter what happens, being at work won't feel safe again for a long, long time.

So many things about this tragedy are beyond comprehension.  No one, except for the shooter, can ever really know what would lead a person down a path that would end in massacring children.  Doctors, neighbors, teachers, school counselors, and news anchors can spend countless hours speculating about the mental state of Adam Lanza, but only Adam could have told you why he did what he did.  I have listened to many of the details given about this young man whom, by all accounts, no one really knew, yet about whom everyone seems to have plenty to say.  Adam Lanza was obviously troubled-- any stranger could discern that from the events on Friday, December 14th-- but that is really all we will ever know for sure.

What troubles me about all the press this young man is receiving, however, is that many in the media are trying to link Adam's murderous rampage to his Asperger's syndrome diagnosis.  Please, please, PLEASE-- could the media just once do their research before treading into waters they don't understand...  While I, and parents like me, are out trying to spread autism awareness, the media continues to muddy the waters of understanding with ill-guided comments and suggestions about the relationship between autism and violence.

Birdie and "The Talk"

Safety Birdie-- the kid that keeps on amazing me!

Last night, just before bed, Birdie sprung a question on me that I wasn't expecting to hear for quite some time.  I don't know why it surprised me.  Nothing should surprise me anymore, and it usually doesn't.  My girls have proven time and time again that, if nothing else, they are precocious.  I guess my surprise was just a result of not feeling confident that I would handle the topic with the right finesse.

But I'm getting ahead of myself... let me set the stage for you a little.  For the last couple of weeks, Birdie has been bouncing around the idea of starting her own blog.  So cool, right?!  One of my fellow blogger friends, Perry Morgan, suggested several months ago that Birdie might enjoy blogging, but I was hesitant to mention it to her.  Then out of the blue, Birdie asked if I would help her make a blog!  (Sorry, Perry-- you were so right, dude!)  She wants to blog about her fantasy world she calls "The Dimension" and all of the magical creatures that live there. She plans to provide illustrations, as well as an "English to Dimension language dictionary".  I think it sounds like a fabulous creative outlet for her.  She also very politely pointed out that I could list her blog on my blogroll "so that other people could find her on the internet and enjoy her imagination."  Ha-- I love that kid!  I assured her that if she made a blog, she would be at the top of my list.  :)

So, back to the question that left me feeling unprepared...

And We Have an IEP Winner, People!

Last Friday was Birdie's long-awaited IEP planning meeting-- and I am so glad it's over!  (It was quite quick and painless, once we got started.)

During the whole process to acquire special accommodations for Birdie at school, I have been a bit of an emotional wreck.  I find this fact funny, since I know how the system works, know the language of special education, and understand all the hoops that must be leapt through to get services in a public school setting.  I can't imagine how a parent without a background in public education could fair the waters of a typical IEP meeting and leave feeling anything but overwhelmed!

When Princess Met Prince Charming

As I have mentioned before in a previous post, Princess has a *dun, dun, dunnnnn* Boyfriend.  I know-- crazy, right?  This is, after all, the child I withheld macaroni and cheese from in order to get her to interact with the boys in her class.  But for Princess, there is no need to interact with other boys because she is already friends with the most awesome boy on the planet, and his name is Charming.  *sigh*

Prince Charming and Princess at her 7th birthday "party"

Small Steps

Princess and Birdie's Girl Scout troop had a hike after school today.  The goal was to complete their hiking badge requirements.  We met at a local park with nature trails for our adventure.  The trails were familiar to us, because my husband and I had taken the girls to this park to geocache in the past.  Both Princess and Birdie were looking forward to being "trail experts" on the hike.

Birdie decided to wear the deer hat I made her for today's big hike.  She thought she could deflect ticks (of which there were THOUSANDS) and try to attract wildlife at the same time.  She had high hopes that Bambi would mosey right up to her and start a conversation-- and I am sure she would have been more than happy to interpret "deer" so that the rest of the troop could follow along.  I am sad to report that no such wildlife encounter occurred.  Birdie and several of her troop sisters did, however, point out a dead vole, a scat deposit (lying suspiciously next to the vole, like some sort of nature-mob manifesto), several bugs and a caterpillar, lichen, tree fungi, and every other "cool piece of nature" she could find.  The dead vole and the animal poo, which we suspect may have been from a fox, were all Birdie could talk about on the drive home.  Welcome to my world, y'all.

Doesn't she look thrilled in this picture?  Birdie really is having a blast, she just needs a snack--
and the troop leader caught her just before she grinned.  (See the nifty hat I made?)

Going Out to Eat (Shared from Autism Speaks blog)

Practice

Going Out to Eat <--- link!!!

I just had to share this article.  It is relevant to more than just autistic kids and their parents-- everyone could use some of these suggestions with their children in today's electronic age of iPods and texting at the dinner table.

And the segment on ABC's What Would You Do? is amazing!  It just goes to show that awareness of autism is on the rise and that awareness is a great thing!

You may also remember my post on Dining Out... maybe I can stress less and eat out more now that diners are more understanding.

Jack the Ripper (Among Other Things) Makes My Neighbors Nervous

Birdie exploring the yard

My family has lived in our current house for nearly five years now, and it has been just recently that the neighborhood kids have really started to "get" my girls.  I know this comes as a shock to you, but Princess and Birdie aren't exactly-- how should I put it?-- "down with" kids their age.  They are reeeee-ally not into most of the outdoor games their peers like to play, either.  (You know, like tag, or riding bikes, or soccer-- just about anything requiring physical contact or eye contact.)  THAT is a problem.  When you are seven and you don't usually like playing seven year-olds' games with seven year-olds, making and keeping friends can be challenging-- to put it mildly.  But my kids and my neighbors' kids keep trying, so there is still hope.

The way my kids play-- or don't play-- with other children makes everyone else in the 'hood nervous.  With Princess and Birdie, you can count on lots of scowling and shouting and very little sharing and sportsmanship...  Unless, of course, by sportsmanship, you mean that they are going to win.  Then there is lots of sportsmanship-- right up until it becomes unsportsmanlike gloating.

Wearing Our Easter Best

My husband returned from yet another business trip yesterday evening.  He is gone more than he is home lately.  Princess used to give Hubby a very hard time for a day or two after returning from a trip.  She would be so angry with her dad for leaving that it would take her awhile to forgive him once he got home.  Fortunately, that has not been the case recently.  I suppose she no longer has time to be mad at him if she plans on squeezing in any quality time with him these days.

Because everyone was fairly amicable this morning, we decided to go out for lunch at a favorite local restaurant.  The thought of eating out inspired Princess to get gussied up in her "Easter best".  We got quite a few lingering looks as we were led back to our table, as you can imagine.  This isn't the standard dress code for a food-on-a-plate restaurant.  (You'd be hard pressed to find this outfit at a food-in-a-sack restaurant most of the time.)  But she and I both thought she looked just lovely, and our opinions are the only ones that really matter.  And maybe her dad's.  Maybe.

Princess in her finest Easter duds

Why I'm here bending your ear...

I've considered off and on for quite some time now about writing a blog.  I have waffled on getting started for many reasons, many of which boil down "why would anybody read what I blog about anyway?"  And I've wondered if it is conceited to want to write about my life and publish it for the world (kind of) to read.  Ultimately, I came to the following conclusions: a)  I don't care if anyone reads my writing, and b) writing about my life is a very inexpensive form of therapy for me.  The most this blog may cost me is a laugh at my expensive-- a price I am willing to pay to feel sane at the end.  :)

So what do I have to share, you might ask?  Is this going to be another monolog by some SAHM that has nothing better to do than overshare online?  Maybe, but I hope not.